Tuesday, July 16, 2013

In which we talk about good songs and bad jobs....

Today's post is brought to you by the Department of Repetitive Redundancy Redundancy Department.

aka - Okay, okay, we get it, we're not going anywhere until something turns green....










"Hey, Maddy, I found the lyrics to "Heaven" in here!" I can see why she collects tour programs. Awesome pictures and stuff.

"I used to have an old issue of Star Hits that had them - along with one of the cutest full-page pics of the band like, ever," she said. "I've been stalking eBay for years trying to find a copy."

"I love the song. Even if the video weren't awesome, the song would still be," I said. I think I read that all three of them came down with colds after they filmed it. Not too surprising....

"I like it too, even after finding out what's it's about," she said.

"Which is?"

"Nuclear war. The hole in the sky where the sun don't shine is the mushroom cloud and the world at the window gone underground referred to a fallout shelter. Of course, back then, there really was a chance of just that happening. I used to have nightmares about it. Now it all seems kind of silly - which it was then, but it was the kind of silly that could have ended life on earth as we know it."

No offense to Richard Butler, but I'll keep my own happy-in-the-face-of-whatever interpenetration of the song. And I'm just glad that we don't have to worry about stuff like that these days....

Anyway....

"Did you read this, Maddy? John said his worst job ever was in a curtain factory."

"Cute. One of my worst decisions ever involved trying to make curtains for the back door. By the time I got them the same length, they only came about halfway way down the door. So I just stuck the old ones back up and pretended nothing had happened."

"So what was your worst job ever?" I looked around.

"Oh man..." She looked thoughtful. "I'd say it was my short stint at that little weekly paper. One day my boss, the editor, called me into his office, gave me five bucks and told me to walk up to this little convenience store about a block and a half up because they were having a sale on paper napkins. All well and good, but they were for the bathroom. He couldn't find toilet paper cheap enough to suit him, so it was napkins. It probably seemed like a good idea until the toilet clogged. He also got a fax machine, had it hooked up to the assistant editor's line because he didn't want to pay for another phone line, then wouldn't give out the number because he didn't want anyone sending him faxes because "paper costs money." He was also too cheap to buy a stamp moistener - this was before they started making self-adhesive ones - so I once ended up licking about seventy stamps in a row sending out letters. I could probably have hung from the wall by my tongue after that one." She looked around. "Another place I worked - which was a really good job - I was helping one of the managers send out letters calling for papers for a technical journal he was editing. We had about 1200 names. I thought ahead and brought in a sponge to moisten the envelopes with. He was helping me stuff and seal the envelopes and the first day, he brought over a box of about three hundred. He looked a little green, so I asked him if he was okay. He saw the sponge, slapped his forehead and groaned "Oh man, I wish I'd thought of that...." He'd just licked three hundred envelopes, the poor guy. I felt so bad for him."

Hmmmm. I think I'll stick with blogging....

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